Go on then, tell us what's on your mind...
We may even respond out of unbridled masochism.
Updated at meaningless intervals!

Remember Lambert's words:
"You only have one life. If you
value it... read another page."

FEBRUARY 19, 2002

Banjo-Kazooie Rap

<Opening:>
Here-Here-{Music Stop} [Kel's Voice] AW! HERE IT GOES!
So they're {Music Stop} {Screen Begins to flash rapidly} FINALLY!!!!!
Here, performing for you
Soon you'll know the words
And you'll join in too!
Take your hands and feathers
And flap and clap
As we show you how
Rareware Raps!
HUH!

<Theme [Half]:>
B-K!
Banjo-K!

<Banjo:>
He's the oldest of them all
You want him? WELL...
From Diddy Kong [Racing],
He rings a bell
His Blue Backpack
Can Taxi and hurt
If he gets in
He covers the turf!
He's Larger [Memory]
Deeper [Voice]
And tighter [Pants] too!
Here's the next member
Of the BK Crew!
HUH!

<Theme [Full]:>
B-K!
Bannnnjo!
B-K!
AND KAZOOIE!

<Kazooie:>
This bird's got power
To beat up you dudes!
She jump real high
To suit the [Atti]'tude
She's quick and smart
With her two legs
She can Glide through the land,
And fire ten eggs!
If you hurt her,
You get hurt, nerd,
With a flip and a flop
She's one cool Bird!
HUH!

{Repeat Half Theme}

<Jamjars:>
He has no smile
He has a [Shoe]Lace,
[Sounds]
This mole has a hidden face!
He can teach moves
When he wants to,
Take those notes
Just from you
Dig Silos
Just like a raccoon
This WEIRD mole
Just loves this tune!
HUH!

{Repeat Full Theme}

<Mumbo:>
He's Magician again
With Wumba Too
And remember
What he promised to do! {T-Rex Sounds}
He do ma-gic
While on the pad
With his Zap-Stick out
This guy is Rad!
He'll kill Wumba
By this afternoon
But Grunty? Sweet Dreams!
'Cause he hates - you!
HAH! {Not Huh!}

{Repeat Full Theme}

<Grunty:>
Finally
She's here for you
It's the BAD Member
Of the BK Crew
This Girl
It's SOOOOOO Funny
Can make the duo
Laugh to their tummy
Can control HAG-1
With NO ease
Makes being a boss
Seem not a brease
She is real bony
She doesn't rhyme [Anymore]
But this boss
'll give you a time!
HUH!

<Ep A Louge:>
Come on Stinky,
Take it to the edge!
<ETC.>