Does anyone even know what Knackers means? It's not an English word. It's Australian and it means (La la la. - Ed)

Careful! Industry secret. Anyway, who says it's Australian?

It has always struck me as strange that people have this concept of a "last cheat" in Goldeneye, because the way the cheats are laid out, there is obviously going to be a space there with any odd number of cheats. Ridiculous.
John Fletcher

Yes, but now you're assuming people have common sense.

Someone (uh, me), somewhere (hmmm, my house) is designing Stocwaldd (pronounced Stock-vault) as we speak. And then there will be the sequel, Bohegkt (pronounced Joenz).
Amanda Marie Schroeder, a.k.a Kablooie, evil twin of Kazooie

Is that Bohegkt: Return to Stocwaldd? Fantastic.

Ricky Martin's teeth frighten me.
Cliff Campbell

I can only assume you've never heard of Janet Street-Porter.

In the instruction booklet of banjo-kazooie it talks about mumbo needing his mask until gruntilda dies. in bt are you showing what mumbo will look like without his beard? i need to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It had to be, really.

Now I know what you're up to. You've already completed Mr. Pants 64, but you are waiting to release it until you can sell it as part of a box set, along with its sequel, Mr. Pants 2: Proximity Arsebolts. Admit it.

Alright, I admit it. But it's for the Commodore 64!!! Great.

Can I have your job? It seems like fun deleting some peoples messages to you and making fun of others.

It is, it's great fun. Smelly.

All of a sudden, I noticed that Louis Armstrong was standing in the corner, playing Conker's Pocket Tales for Game Boy Color. Then, in the other corner, I noticed that Tom Jones was standing around in his tight pants, playing Goldeneye 007.
Cornelius, the Corn Flakes rooster

Didn't you see Elvis with his personal copy of Beta GoldenEye?

Will you make a game called "The Smelly French" or "The French Suck"? I'd buy it just to brag to my friends that Rare agrees with me.

Now you know we couldn't possibly (snigger) condone such a thing.

I don't know if you know this but Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants. So you may want to tell DK to put on some trousers.

Lack of pants is a bit more serious than lack of trousers...

DataDyne sounds like a robot eatery. Why don't you just call it the Robot Restaurant. I can just see it, Joanna has been sent to infiltrate the evil Robot Restaurant! Ohh, how exciting!!

Are you sure you don't mean 'excruciating'?

I've noticed that the only letters that get answered are short and dumb ones, so this letter is short and dumb.
Alastair Craig aka Slartibartfast

"So it's lucky I'm short and dumb" would have been funnier.

I wish you could go up Clanker's butt.

Who says he's got one? He's a magic whale, remember?

I'm an "American". I saw Austin Powers "2". Then I heard that "Shag" was a "Bad Word" over in "Great Britain". Is it?

Um. Depends on your definition of 'bad'. 'Ungentlemanly', maybe.

Why does Conker smile, wink, and give you a 'thumbs up' after his evening with Berri? I have a dirty suspicion, but don't tell me otherwise -- I like thinking that.

Obviously they're going hitchhiking, you disgusting boy.

Arse 2000. Just think, with NURBS or Bezier curves, you could make a perfectly round arse model. Let the games begin!

Amazing. Who could have pictured such advances 20 years ago?

You can tell Duncan Botwood to bloody cheer up a bit! - looks to me like all his migraines have come at once.
Chris Todd

"Laughing Pixie" Botwood is crazily anti-photogenic, that's all.

Goldeneye was based on a movie... and Blast Corps was based on a navel wasn't it?

Ha ha. He said 'navel'. Ha ha ha. Let's all laugh at the typo.

Is farting as popular in Britain as it is in the States? Tell the truth.
George McMillan

Almost definitely more so.

I want to fill up all of Snippits by myself, so I will be sending all of the different crap that pops into my head directly to you. Great, now I'm going to cackle.
The Ponyboy

Alas, beaten to it by the other bearers of a headful of crap.

July 19, 1999
June 23, 1999
June 4, 1999
April 29, 1999
March 30, 1999
March 1, 1999
February 11, 1999
December 24, 1998
December 1, 1998
November 2, 1998
October 7, 1998
September 25, 1998
August 28, 1998
July 24, 1998
June 23, 1998
June 2, 1998

Main Scribes Index